perfect

Oh golly, I was a bawling mess this morning. I watched the music video for Pink's song, "Perfect." It totally changed the song for me. It was always a good song, but I guess I interpreted it as maybe a boyfriend/husband song or relationship song... but no... it's a mother/child song, a friend song.

Disclaimer!! It's a bit disturbing and hard to watch... but so touching at the same time. I think we are so hard on each other, and at the same time hard on ourselves. It's just not fair.

I finished watching the video and just held Wesley so hard, and told him over and over again how much I loved him. I wish I could protect him from the world. I wish I could protect everyone from the harsh world. I wish there was a way I could instill confidence in every single person out there that they are a child of God, that He loves them and forgives them no matter what, that no one's opinion really matters. You are you and you should never be afraid to be you. As long as you are trying and growing and learning, you are just as you should be.

I don't know if I necessarily agree with the "concept" (??) of the video that you aren't an acceptable person until you get a guy (I don't believe that), but seeing her struggles and her hurt and her ultimate triumph (thank goodness) is just an incredible experience. (haha and I love the fact it's Deb from Napolean Dynamite!) I'm glad she found something she was good at and ran with it. Everyone needs that. We are all "perfect" at something. We just need the confidence to find it.

It just really puts on my shoulders the full weight of what being a mother really means. Wesley needs to know every day that no matter how crazy things get, no matter how bonkers he is, he will always be perfect to me. I love him more than anything. Even when he throws his train tracks at my head and spills his cup of milk all over the floor. Even when. He is so special.

OK, so here it is, if you haven't seen it.