I was halfway done shopping when Wesley decided he no longer wanted to be asleep. He instead wanted to be awake, wide awake, and screaming, and maybe it would be fun to be hungry. And it would also be fun to gouge his cheek with a fingernail, so he was also bleeding.
So, I multi-tasked. I:
- Wheeled the cart to an empty aisle (sugar/flour and spices, to be exact)
- Dug out the diaper bag from under Doritoes, bread loaves, cans of Progresso soup, etc.
- Used my water bottle to wet a baby washcloth (kept in the diaper bag), to wash the blood-smeared face
- Scrambled to find the pacifier (also in the diaper bag)
- Attemped to swaddle him in his carseat
So, yes, that was me, nursing my baby in the corner chair at the Albertson's pharmacy this afternoon. I used an apron to be discreet, but sorry if I offended anyone. I even asked the pharmacy tech -- a male -- if he felt it was inappropriate and he said if I felt comfortable doing it, I should do it. I felt a lot more comfortable doing that than having a crying baby all throughout the grocery store.
That placated him a little bit, but he was definitely done with the grocery store. Unfortunately, I wasn't. I still had some stuff to get. So my mind was racing. I strategically mapped out the whole store in my head and and I rushed through my shopping list. Wesley wasn't thrilled.
Along the way, I attemped to (and sometimes succeeded) swaddle him in the following locations:
- Aforementioned chair at the pharmacy
- Chair of an outdoor patio furniture display
- Top of a mega-box of Huggies diapers on display
Holding a swaddled baby with one hand and a pacifier in his mouth with the other, while steering the cart with, well, my foot, proved to be quite difficult. But I made it. I got out of there and we're all alive.
Here is where I get mushy.
When we got home, I opened the trunk of the car to decide which bags could come upstairs with me and the little man, and I glanced at him over the backseat. He was quietly looking out the window at who knows what, his blue eyes wide and so intent on taking in this big new world he has discovered. He was just so precious. Even though I said to myself, "why couldn't you quietly look at the world in the grocery store?," I found myself unable to stay mad at the little guy. It was a crazy, frustrating afternoon, but it was just one piece of my new life that includes him. Sweet baby Wesley.
sigh
I always knew my life would change. I did. I told myself that over and over again for 9 months. But I never really knew. I just didn't. I couldn't. Sometimes things just happen in our lives, and we're never the same. Yes, we know we won't be the same... but at the same time, we have no idea.
Whether it's as small as moving up to middle school from elementary school or as big as taking the plunge by getting married... it's change. We never really know what's going to happen. We just can't. But we do it anyway, and we always make it. We live.
Well, more adventures to come, I'm sure. It's the nature of this change in my life. I'll keep you posted.
4 comments:
I feel like I am always commenting on your blog...hopefully you don't mind.
Have you tried a bjorn or a moby or something like that in the grocery store? Nathan loved to be hanging from me while shopping from a very early age and I always found that way more successful than lugging in the infant carrier and all of that. I always found that he was much happier, the closer he could be to me in places like the store. Something to try...I don't know...every kid is different.
mine was in a department store and I went into the changing room and cried. Yeah, it's not the best story. Yours is good with details and all. I left pretty quick after that, but nursing was a better solution for me too that to bear the thought that he might be upset.
Oh dear. The stress just oozed out of this post, didn't it? You are far more brave than I. So glad you survived - and you're right about all the change. We will never know exactly what we're in for, into whatever new chapter we're heading.
Yes, Jackson's meltdown was in Walmart and I was checking out- at the self check out! I didn't have much choice, but to let him cry. One of the employees came over and tried to calm him down. As I was leaving she said something like "mommy, don't try that again." I went home and cried and vowed I would never go to the grocery store alone with him again. But I did and it only gets better. Once Wesley can hold his body up decently, he may enjoy just sitting propped up in the front of the cart. I tried that with Jackson at about 4 months and he loved it!
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